20May

Tired of Elliptical? Try a Gameful Approach

May 20, 2019 Amanda Fontaine

Does your exercise routine sound like this? 30 min elliptical one day – maybe throw some weights around or do some machines another day – walk the dog. This routine gets booooringgggg and many of my clients come to me feeling flat, tired and totally uninspired.

If you aren’t getting enough physical activity in throughout the week or don’t know what to do for workouts, trust me I get it- you’re busy! The last thing you want to do is add “design a personalized FUN workout” on your to do list. Don’t let coming up with exercises be a chore and something that is so essential to life feel like a punishment.

Just like in my personal training with clients, I love calling Fridays FUN Fridays because people who have come to the gym all week (or multiple days) need something different to look forward to. That’s why I started making Fridays about games in the workout.

Do you have one day a week you can really look forward to the workout? Something that gets you excited and makes it FUN?

Well you can have these FUN Friday workouts too!

With my program THRIVE ON: 6 Weeks of Making Fitness FUN you will get more physical activity throughout your week. The more we get our body moving the better we feel. I can attest to this, on the days I don’t feel like working out I always feel better after I do. My mood is better too.

One of the best things about my weekly workouts is I do the heavy lifting (pun intended) for you. There’s no more need to struggle with what to do. Each week you will get a plan that keeps you motivated to move more and not dread ever going to the gym again. You can still walk the dog, and do your 30 mins of elliptical but try adding in a little more FUN a couple days a week and see how you like it! It’s time to feel GREAT again 🙂

11Mar

How to Achieve Work/Life Balance

March 11, 2019 Amanda Fontaine

The first blog in this series was an overview of work/life balance and what it means . Now we will dive deeper in on How to Achieve Work/Life Balance.

1 – Make time to connect with others. #Relationships

There is a Ted Talk 75 year study on happiness and those people who were happier were those who actively worked to replace workmates with new playmates. What are you doing to develop new relationships or grow deeper in the ones you have?

2 – Say NO

It’s okay to say no where and when you need to. “No” doesn’t have to mean a no forever, but sometimes a no for right now is enough. Saying no to some things is crucial to achieving work/life balance and it’s a powerful thing.

3 – Rest

Take 1 day a week and do not do any work. Just try it and maybe you’ll see that you feel rejuvenated and get more work done on other days of the week. You can use this as a renewal day, read a book and/or catch up with friends. Try not to just binge watch TV. Some TV is alright but it’s just a distraction and won’t benefit you as much as the other things. Strive for at least 7-8 hours of sleep. In the year 1879 the average American slept 11 hrs/night. Lack of sleep contributes to all sorts of health issues.

4 – Make time for FUN

I can’t ever stress this enough. Make sure you are always making time for things you enjoy.

Stay tuned for the next part of the series: Maintaining/Improving Work Life Balance.

30Nov

Meaning of Authentic Community

November 30, 2018 Amanda Fontaine

Think of people in 3 rings. In the middle is you, your partner, parents, siblings, & people you talk to daily. The outside is our social media network and anyone you’ve ever known. The middle ring (yellow in diagram below) is where we struggle. These are people you might see once/week. The people you build authentic connections with. Who are those people for you? Can you name a handful?

Who do you surround yourself with? The 5 people you talk to the most? Name the 5 people you spend the most time with. It might be coworkers, family, friends etc. Name them, right now. Got it, ok now look at that list and picture those people 50 years from now. That is you.

When it comes to relationships we are greatly influenced, whether we like it or not, by those closest to us. We pick up on their habits and behaviors (it’s a fact of science). It will affect the way we think, our self-esteem and our decisions.

You are the result of the 5 closest people you hang out with. Take a look at those 5 people and you will see what your life will be like in the future. If you do not like what you see, you should change who you surround yourself with.

Ask yourself:
Are these people positive and uplifting?
Do they value the same things in life that you do?
Are they goal-oriented and living life with purpose?
Will these people be supportive and loving of you?
Are they people you can depend on?
Will they be honest with you, even about the hard stuff?
Do they challenge you and make you better?

What does Community mean to you? It’s a group of people you choose. People you have things in common with. Possibly linked by social ties and in close geographical location or settings. Community is where you develop relationships. People in your community become that inner circle of people. You choose these people. Like a lot of things in life it doesn’t just happen. If you don’t have a supportive community go create one. No excuses. A positive peer set will make you feel more confident.

Once you’ve determined what Community means to you, stay tuned for the next blog on How To Build these Authentic Relationships.

19Nov

How Amanda Plays

November 19, 2018 Amanda Fontaine

In this blog I want to share some examples of how I’ve used play in different aspects of my life:

Play in my relationship
I was struggling with being snappy, and short with my boyfriend. In addition to praying for patience and to be slow to anger, I decided to make this a game. Everytime I acted this way he could say “Angelica”. For those of you who didn’t grow up in the 90s with me, she is a cartoon character who appears in Nickelodeon’s show Rugrats. She is the spoiled brat and serves as the main antagonist of the series. This way he could point out to me in a funny way how I was acting. It could lighten the mood and we could joke about it.

https://www.verbicidemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/rugrats-angelica.jpg

Play at work
My coworkers and I constantly make funny comments and pick on each other in a loving way. Not a day goes by that we don’t laugh at each other for something. It puts us all in a better mood. Laughing is good for the soul. It’s contagious. Can you joke with your coworkers? Try lightening the mood and don’t be so serious all the time.

Play in exercise
I could go on and on about this one. If you do the same things over and over again you will get bored. I love variety and mixing things up. The best way I do this with exercise is by creating a game or changing the repetitions or time intervals of exercises to make it a new exciting challenge. Check out my favorite workout card game (https://becomepowerful.com/2017/10/20/fun-games-get-fit-play/ ).

Play with my community
I do this in tons of different ways. One is game nights with my friends. We rotate different games and try new ones (again variety!). We’ve done a couple escape rooms. Check it out in your area. They have different themes and difficulties. Three, the more artsy side we’ve done things like handcrafted night out and wine & design.

These are just a few examples for you to see how play is a part of everything in your life, and if it’s not, it should be.

Later we will talk about how play is important in overcoming sorrow/times of grief, anxiety/depression, motivation to achieve goals and improve mood.

Until then, find little ways you can play at work, in your relationships, being active and with others in your community.

THRIVE On!

06Nov

What Does Work/Life Balance Mean?

November 6, 2018 Amanda Fontaine

As millennials we really value work life balance, but do we actually balance them? Do we even know how? What does work life balance even mean? I will answer all these questions in this blog series. Part 1- What does work life balance mean?

Many of my clients tell me stories about their partners working 20 hour days. I can’t think of any job I would do that controlled my life like that. It’s one thing to know there is a period of time that you have to buckle down and balance may be near impossible, and it’s another thing to have work completely run your life forever.

#1- PURPOSE

If you aren’t doing what you love are you fully living?

We spend most of our day, week, and life working. Why waste so much of your life? There’s the common saying “If you do what you love, you’ll never work a day in your life”. That’s not necessarily true because sometimes you can love your job and it can still feel like work. The saying I prefer is “A job is what your paid for, a career is what you’re made for”. Don’t spend your life just working a job. Do something that you will look back on and feel proud of. At the end of your life will yoube able to say you left a legacy on this world?

Find your purpose in what you do every day. My coworker gave me this one day and said I fit the blue box in the middle, which is purpose. Try and find that middle ground in your life where everything overlaps.

#2- BALANCE is Key

You can do what you love and feel like you are working, but the key is balance. If you are working and not sleeping or eating, that is not balance. If you are not taking care of yourself first, that is not balance. If you are not making time to do things you enjoy, for FUN on a regular basis, that is not balance. Most of us work hard, long days and then just turn to that glass of wine or beer at the end of the day to make things better. Again- that is NOT balance (and trust me I love my wine at the end of a #winddownwinewednesday).

#3- What does work life balance mean?

The first step in determining balance is figuring out what your roles are right now, at this moment in life? They will change. We can only have six roles and everything we do in life should be in accordance to those roles. Watch this quick video to determine your six: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2k_3dZB8Jcc (Fast forward to min 3:15)

To me balance means spiritual, emotional, physical, social and mental health are all take care of. I’m taking care of my spiritual needs by making time for daily devotions, going to small group once a week and church on Sundays. I’m taking care of my physical needs by getting my workouts in, drinking enough water, and eating well. I’m taking care of my social needs by making time to talk and visit relatives, and making time for friends by planning social outings/trips/game nights etc. I’m taking care of my mental needs by getting close to 8 hours of sleep/night and making time for personal development/growth.

You can also think of balance by breaking down life into these 4 quadrants:: Work, Family, Friends and Self.

#4- Work-life blend:

There is often a fine line-if any-between your work and your life. Work is often taking place outside traditional times and spaces. When it comes to the workplace there are two types of people: integrators (those who blend the boundaries between work and life) and segmenters (those who keep work and life completely separate-even to the extreme of not keeping family photos in their office). Integrators have an easier time transitioning between the two. With technology today, its expected of us to be connected all the time and not detaching is the norm. A benefit of segmentors is they report higher levels of well-being. If you’re an integrator, find ways to disconnect and make boundaries for yourself. I am more of an integrator. I love my coworkers and clients and consider them all one big family. When it comes to my schedule, I have learned to say no to taking clients at certain times of the day. I have made my schedule so Mon-Wed are long late days but then Thursdays and Fridays are shorter. I have learned there are days that at a certain time I just have to stop working for the day.

#5- ACTION (remember intention without action is useless):

Think about what purpose means to you. Write a list in each area of the diagram that applies to you
Determine your 6 roles for where your life is right now
Figure out what work/life balance means to YOU (what are your spiritual, physical, mental, social, and emotional needs?)
Set work boundaries and take time to disconnect.
Stay tuned for the next Blog on How to achieve work/life balance.

Check out these RESOURCES:

I started listening to this podcast which is phenomenal: https://www.ted.com/read/ted-podcasts/worklife

27Jul

Create New Experiences

July 27, 2018 Amanda Fontaine

“Without new experiences, something inside you sleeps.” -Frank Herbert

Can you think of the most FUN, active weekend in your adult life? Mine was at my friend Jackie’s bachelorette party weekend at Camp No Counselor. This took place somewhere in Equinunk, PA, but they have them all over the country. I was really looking forward to this weekend ever since Jackie mentioned it to me. Especially because it fits in line with what THRIVE Alive is all about. It was a weekend about reminiscing your childhood/college days, laughing, playing, being active & having FUN at the same time. It was all those things & more

The camp was all inclusive, including alcohol, and the food was actually pretty good. Yes, we camped in bunk beds in a cabin in the woods, this took place at a kids summer camp after all. The camp had everything you could imagine: giant inflatables in the water, giant water slide into the lake, kickball, dodgeball, basketball, volleyball, high ropes course, archery, capture the flag, arts and crafts, you name it. We did activities during the day then had giant themed dance parties at night.

Day one the camp was split into two teams (about 60 people each) and we competed in all sorts of events. The last event was a giant relay race that ended in slip & slide flip cup. My team was way behind and had no chance of winning and somehow came back for the ultimate victory ever. Day two we took a field trip to a lazy river and floated about 5 miles. It was so relaxing and beautiful. Throughout the day we got exercise without realizing it just from walking around camp, playing games and dancing. My apple watch had its highest Move ring goal achieved ever.

I had so much FUN I barely slept, which is not like me at all. I only slept about 12 hours in 3 days, and didn’t even feel it until I went home. I would do this weekend again in a heartbeat. I believe we need to make time to do these things all year round not just once a year. If we incorporate little things throughout our days/weeks that we enjoy, that are FUN, then it makes everything else in life better. Simply just making time to have a game night or go bowling or play a spontaneous game of flip cup, whatever your FUN is, make time for it. Then you will see that you enjoy your job more, your relationships will be better, and you will be happier. I guarantee your life will THRIVE! #permissiongranted #goplay

11Jun

5 Things to Make Your Relationship THRIVE

June 11, 2018 Amanda Fontaine

Being in your twenties and early thirties is all about relationships with a major focus on dating. As I went through my twenties I learned a lot about dating and my view of what I wanted changed as I matured. Part of it had to do with lacking my father my whole life. I had my grandpa as my father figure but it’s not the same. I didn’t realize that until I was 27. Having an absent dad lead me to crave attention from guys and want security. I think that’s why I fell madly in love with a guy way older than me. A year or so after that relationship (my now boyfriend) mentioned to me that you do not really get to know someone for at least 6 months after you meet. I agreed with this, and being friends with someone before dating seems impossible these days but a great way to enter into a relationship. There’s a fine line between trying to be friends with the opposite sex and dating them.

In my very early twenties here is the advice I told myself:

-Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional

-People come and go in life and only those that matter will stay

-Don’t fall for guys so easy. Take it slow. Make them work for it.

-Don’t cling on when it’s not right

-There could be many people in your life you could see yourself marrying

-In a relationship you shouldn’t be upset all the time and you shouldn’t make all the effort

-Be with someone who isn’t afraid to talk about kids or marriage

-Be with someone who’s not afraid of commitment

-Be with someone who cares and makes me a priority

-Choose the guy who will make me a better girl

Well some of those things listed above are important; the focus shouldn’t be on what not to have/do. Over the last few years there have been many talks with my girlfriends about guys and what we want in our partners. My uncle always told me if you have FUN and can communicate you could make any relationship work, including friendships. I added a few others to that list to come up with my 5:

1-Spiritual-Do you have the same spiritual beliefs? Can you encourage each other in that way? For me as a Christian, is that person pointing me towards God and vice versa?

2-Values– Do you value the same things in life? Do you have similar ideas about what the purpose of your life on this earth is?

3-Financial- same financial views– Is one person frugal and the other spends a lot?

4-Intimacy/ physical attractiveness – point blank are you attracted to them? Even if all the other 5 things are there, not being attracted can kill a relationship.

5-Have fun/communicate/best friend – Ultimately if you can have FUN together, communicate about things and solve problems together and consider your partner your best friend, you will make it through anything.

I’m lucky to have all 5 of those with my boyfriend and business partner Brent. Your 5 may be different but it’s important to have solid ground on things that matter and things that will last. It kills me some of the things my friends say they want in a relationship. Sadly, I know they will keep going on tinder and bumble dates until their views change and they will never find the “right” person. Andy Stanley says that’s a myth btw. Stop looking for the right person and focus on becoming the right person. Ask yourself- Are *you* the person the person you’re looking for is looking for? There may be many people in your life you could see yourself marrying, but you have to be at the right place for yourself and the same for that person.

So if you’ve found that person, how do you stay happy?

What makes a happy couple:

1-Mutual submission

2-No expectations

3-Give each other lots of grace

We all have hopes, dreams and desires. Does your partner know what yours are? Be clear. These can often turn into expectations to be fulfilled and then disappointments. Do you think your spouse owes you something? As long as you think your spouse owes you something, your marriage will be all about keeping score, which will destroy your love. You will have to make a choice over and over and over again to live by those 3 things, and it’s not easy. Imagine a relationship where both people are living by all 3- now that’s a beautiful thing.

Check out some of the Andy Stanley podcasts on the “Your Move” app. He has GREAT advice (whether you’re a Christian or not) on life, love and business.

Here’s one of the episodes in the series “What happy couples know”:

http://subspla.sh/skfpxhg

Go THRIVE in your relationships! <3

19Mar

7 Ways to Be Happy

March 19, 2018 Amanda Fontaine

If you struggle to find happiness in life you aren’t alone. We all go through periods where we may struggle to be happy. Happiness is in us all the time but we lose track of it. We are distracted by constantly trying to do stuff and climb the corporate ladder.

The definition of happy is “feeling pleasure and enjoyment because of your life, situation, etc.”

Here’s what I’ve found to be my happy recipe:

Remember your core values and beliefs– Are you living in accordance with those? Have you ever thought deeply about those mean to you? Write them down. If you are doing things that don’t line up then make adjustments.
Do you have a chemical imbalance?- Our bodies are complex and designed to get a well balanced amount of nutrients in order to operate at its best ability. Having low vitamin B, D, magnesium and other vitamins are shown to be linked with depression. Talk to your doctor and have blood work done to see if you have any nutrient deficiencies and try eating a diet with healthy whole foods.
Stop comparing your life to social media– Instagram, Facebook and Snapchat have gotten way out of hand these days. You only see filtered pictures about how great everyone looks and how amazing their life is. You are left to think your life is boring. I can’t tell you how many times I have commented on my friends Snapchat story and thought they had the best weekend ever just to find out it really wasn’t all that great. You see one happy family photo on the beach and that 60 seconds it took to take that photo was the only time they weren’t fighting all weekend. You never know the real story on the other side of that photo. You don’t know the struggles that person has. We don’t post about those. Can you imagine what would happen to social media if we did?
Free yourself– Free your heart of hatred. Learn to let things go. Choose not to let little things bother you. Free yourself to give and serve your community. Having an impact on others is shown to bring personal satisfaction. Free your mind of worries.
Expect less– Live life as you experience it, not as you think it ought to be. If we stop living with expectations of how our life should be and just start being thankful for what we have we can learn to appreciate the small things. The more simply we live the happier we are. Are you working to afford a living or survive life? The more money you have does not bring happiness, it brings more debt. Do you want a higher salary just so you can buy that new car or fancy house? *Check back in with your values to remind yourself what really matters.
Try journaling– This can be as simple as writing down 3 things you are thankful for every day.
Make time in your schedule for FUN activities?- Make this as much of a priority as eating and drinking. Once you do, you will see how much better everything else seems to go. We are more productive at work and have better relationships when we allow ourselves this freedom.

Remember, happiness is everywhere but it starts within us. You have to find it. Choose to be happy!

A great resource for instant peptalks to boost positivity is a book by Karen Salmansohn called Think Happy.

13Feb

7 Properties of PLAY

February 13, 2018 Amanda Fontaine

“ The opposite of play is not work — the opposite of play is depression.”- Dr. Stuart Brown

Dr. Brown says when play is happening, almost all of these 7 things are firing.

Play is Apparently Purposeless

Play does not seem essential because it does not provide us our daily needs for food or pay our bills, but it’s not that play has no purpose. The purpose of play is not evident right away. It’s when we lack play in our lives that we see its necessity.

Play is Voluntary

There is no law that says we must play. It is something we must enter into freely. Ever been forced to “play” a game, or do something “fun” that is not fun for you? We have to unleash the protective measure against our vulnerability to play.

Play has an Inherent Attraction

Play is natural. Research suggests we are all wired by evolution to play. What you find fun may not be fun for me and vice versa. Find what you love and what’s stimulating for you. Play cures boredom, and if you’ve ever been bored try something new.

Play involves a Freedom from Time

When we play we lose track of time. We are in such a present state that time doesn’t matter because we are so focused on the activity of that moment.

Play involves a Diminished Consciousness of Self

During play our minds are free of thought in the sense that we aren’t focused on thinking. We don’t have to worry about what other people think of us, or what we look like. We aren’t thinking about ourselves at all.

Play involves Improvisational Potential

Play can allow you to imagine new possibilities and see what follows. We can discover new (maybe just new to us) patterns of thinking, feeling, and acting in the world. These new patterns can provide new ways of being and connecting with others.

Play produces Continuation Desire

Play desires more play. If you truly entered into a state of play you don’t want it to end and find ways to continue.

Do you experience any of these 7 properties on a regular basis? If not, you need to schedule more time for PLAY. If you need help on how to do that, or want ideas comment below and Amanda can help you find play escape.

28Dec

Adults Should Play

December 28, 2017 Amanda Fontaine

“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing”- George Bernard Shaw

Kidult definition:

Noun- an adult with an air of free-spiritedness; childlike in spirit. A person who knows how to have fun.

Adjective- Characteristic of an adult engaged in lighthearted behavior; to have a good, entertaining time.

Take a few minutes and think back to your younger years and what you did. Picture yourself first as a kid- did you play outside, read books, play sports, build Legos, do arts and crafts? Now picture yourself a littler older in high school. What emotions were present at those times? What energy did you feel? Two emotions I feel when “playing” are joy and connection. They are two things I really value in life, and two things I felt as a kid. I can feel this way when I’m playing Ping-Pong or games with my cousins, also when I’m engaging with my coworkers, joking around with each other. It’s that simple.

Somewhere in adolescence is when we start to define our lives based on what the world thinks of us, and what the world is pushing us to do. We lose sight of what is fun. Without realizing it we stop doing these things from our youth.

What would it look like for you to be a kidult? If you could be free now and be a person who knows how to have fun (put time, work, kids, all responsibilities aside) what would you do to feel the way you did before you were an adult? What would life without restraint be like for you? I don’t just mean be able to get a couple more rounds of golf in or binge watch your favorite TV shows, even if those are things you enjoy. What could you do today to feel those same emotions as when you were a kid?

Just like exercise requires getting yourself in the right mindset, the same is true for play. As adults we don’t think it’s okay. You need to ALLOW YOURSELF TO PLAY! Many studies are now showing the biological importance of play and it’s positive impact on the human brain. Other benefits include better relationships, more successful at work, bonding, and better moods.

Be spontaneous, set aside your ego, do something you haven’t done in a while and create those opportunities to play. Be a Kidult.

https://usplaycoalition.org/play-the-fountain-of-youth-the-role-of-play-in-adult-neurogenesis

https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/benefits-of-play-for-adults.htm